I am sure many of you know, that Stacy and I are the parents of seven children. Their ages are 19, 16, 15, 13, 8, 4 & 2. This gap in ages means that we are constantly faced with very different needs. We can add lots of data to the debate of who are more difficult – teenagers or toddlers? I think I have a great understanding of diversity because none of these kids are alike – there is no such thing as "what works for one works for all".
Making time with our family is very important for us. I have found that when we fail to schedule time together we can get lost in individual pursuits. We are constantly pulled in nine different directions. As our family ages, it is becoming more difficult to get us all together. The amount of ball games we attend each week is staggering.
Fortunately, we have a habit of setting aside one night a week as family night. Each Monday night, we get together as a family to have fun and to discuss family matters. We do our best to keep this night free from other scheduled activities. As the children age, the conversations we are able to have together are simply amazing.
Big Afro Night
Stacy and I were both blessed with very curly hair. One of her friends in college said that if we were to marry, our kids would have scary curly hair. Her friend's words have proven to be prophetic. Our children have beautiful curly hair and we have a lot of fun with it.
This past Monday, we decided to pick our hair out and see whose afro is the biggest. I have not grown my hair out for a long time and some of my kids have never seen it as long as it is now. The picture you see is of me and my sons. I love this picture because it reminds me of how much fun we had talking about our hair and trying different ways to poof it up and make it big. We talked about my bald spot in the back which you can't see in this picture and wondered whether or not my kids would lose their hair. I have dared my kids to cut their hair into "mullets" so that they can wear their hair like I did when I was their age. They are afraid of what their friends might say. We had a lot of fun just messing with our hair.
You can see my arm around my oldest son. I am trying to hold him down and he is trying to stand on his tiptoes so that he looks taller in the picture. This was a happy time for us to celebrate the common family trait we have of curly hair.
We do something fun like this almost every week. It doesn't cost us any money and we truly enjoy getting together. We sing together and play together. It is an amazing thing to have a 16 year old son ask to play the Farmer in the Dell or Duck-Duck-Goose just because he loves to watch his two year old sister get so excited to play. Because we take the time to purposely be together as a family, it makes it easier for us to be together when we have other options. We often choose to be together because we like being together.
What Are You Doing To Be With Your Family?
I have the greatest job in the world. I get to work with people who are striving to become their very best. My clients learn to enjoy their personal relationships more. They become more healthy. They learn to see things as they really are. They become better leaders at work. They learn how to pursue individual talents. They learn how to be whole. It is a great work that I do, and I am good it.
Despite the success that I enjoy working with my clients, I know that the greatest work I will ever do is within the walls of my own home. There is no success that will overcome the feeling I will have if I fail with my family. These thoughts keep me focused on what I need to do to strengthen my family. It takes a lot of work and very often I find myself sacrificing my own personal wants to just be there with my kids.
If you are a parent, then please think for a moment about your children. Are you spending enough time with them? I am sure you are taking the time to develop customer relationships, are you equally focused on developing your family relationships? What are you doing with your family that is fun? The current economic strains can cause us to think that we can't afford to do anything fun, but it did not cost us anything to poof our hair up. How can you create fun with your children? For those of you with adult children, what are you doing to stay connected with these people you have created? How are you being there for those adults who now need a different kind of parent?
You know they grow up fast, so please pay attention and don't let the moments pass by without doing something to strengthen your family. Please do me a favor today. FInd a reason to say something nice to your kids. Play a joke on them for April Fool's Day and let them know how much you love them. You will never regret it.
Life is Good!
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