Our time here in Nephi is nearly over. On Sunday, most of us will head back to Apple Valley. None of us are ready to go. None of us want to go back. We enjoy the pace and rhythm of life here in this beautiful city.
Life here is simple. By saying that, I do not mean to suggest that the people here are simple, or that they do not deal with the constant challenges of life. The people here are as intelligent as those that I have met in any big city. They face soul-stretching experiences just like the rest of us.
In Nephi City
When I first mentioned that we would be living here in Nephi for the summer, I told you that this was going to be a "Walden Pond" type experience for our family. We left our spacious home, and all of our worldly possessions, with the exception of our cars and what we could fit in a few small suitcases to live in a small (900 sq.ft.) home that was originally built out of logs in the late 1800's. The ten of us have coexisted here in this tiny abode with one bathroom and zero air conditioners. I have never felt closer to my family. We have not had one argument. We have worked, played and laughed together in so many different ways. While we were discovering Nephi, we discovered each other again and we learned to see each other with different eyes.
We regularly ask each other what we miss most about what we left behind in Apple Valley. We all struggle to come up with an answer to that question. We recognize that we need a little more space in this home, but not much more. We haven't missed any of the material possessions we left behind.
We also regularly ask about the things we are learning. There are so many lessons; I want to focus on just one. We are all the same.
A Focus On Diversity Divides Us
In this city, I have regularly associated with men and women who make their living as farmers, ranchers, and tradesman. Their primary education comes from life experiences. This is very different from the people I work with who are academically educated and administratively focused. Yet they possess the same hopes, dreams and aspirations. They go about the pursuit of them very differently, but the desired outcome, what they are looking forward to, is very similar.
Corporate and political agendas are constantly asking us to value our differences. I am attracted to differences, but the truth is, it is hard for me to see them, and to approach people who are different until I can see how we are alike. When I strictly focus on the differences, I fail to make the connection of trust that I need to make in order to grow the relationship. A focus on differences nearly always yields a belief that somebody needs to change so that they can become more like me. I have never seen it lead to more collaboration and trust – I have only seen it build more walls.
We are all the same in so many ways. If we could just see that, I think we would build greater harmony, greater peace and a greater ability to celebrate each other for who we really are. When I see the similarities, I begin to love the other. When I love the other, I learn to love the whole person. I see the human being. I see the complete person and I learn to love them for their strengths. When I perceive an area where I can help, an area where I possess a strength that the other seems to be lacking, I don't judge – I jump in and help.
I learned while here that giving and receiving help are both acts of love. In the past, I was a great giver, but a terrible receiver. I thought that the fact that I needed help was a sign of weakness. Now I see it as an opportunity to allow others to love and care for me. I see it as an opportunity for them to bless my life with their strength. I need that. I think you need that too. This new awareness does not make me sit around and wait for somebody to help me, it makes me want to go out and help others even more. I know that if I help somebody, I will learn to love and see them, and then they will learn to see and love me.
My Take Away
I leave Nephi with a desire to be more of a friend to those around me. I will never forget the many acts of service that I have received from my community here. I have never had so many great friends in all my life. I don't want to go home, but I know I must. I have friends here, lifetime friends, who I will never forget. I love them and they love me. They have taught me how to live. They have taught me, a giver, how to give. I see more clearly now. I feel more than I have felt in a long time. My tears flow freely as I think about leaving. Those tears will be wasted if I return to "life the way it was" when I get home.
I must use this beautiful example of a community as a model for my way of being in my own community. I will be away from my friends here, so I must use their example of friendship to discover the friends I have never seen during my 18 years of life in Apple Valley. They are there, I know it. I will find them.
I hope that what I am writing will adequately express what I am feeling. I feel like there is so much that I would like to say about this, but I lack the words to express it. Perhaps you have already learned this lesson. If not, look around. I am sure that if you do, you will discover vast resources of human capital. There is enough focus in the world on the resources side of that equation. I invite you to see that human side. Take a break and explore those reserves.
I titled this post "The Summer Of Our Enlightenment" because I wanted to find the exact opposite to "The Winter Of Our Discontent". I think we are experiencing a "winter of discontent" in the world right now. I think our discontent is coming from the many walls we build each day that separate us from the simple life we all long for. It is right here in front of us. Do you see it?
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