I have an appointment scheduled today at 4:00 PM with a service provider. I am hoping, that through our conversations, we will come to an agreement for them to provide us with some SEO services that we may need. We are just beginning our conversations, so it is too early to tell where they will lead, but I am excited about what the future might bring.
Life – It Happens!
Both the service provider and myself are in the middle of some projects that are keeping us pretty busy. We started talking about a time to meet early last week and it was difficult to find a time when we were both free to have this meeting.
Last night at our rehearsal, our directors made a plea for the cast members to come today at 3:00 PM to help set the stage. There is some painting that needs to be done, as well as placing the panels and other permanent props in place. I feel very committed to this show and so I am doing my best this morning to clear my schedule so that I can be there to help out.
I knew that in order to do so, I would have to reschedule my appointment for later this afternoon. As I began to write the email to my provider I spent a few moments thinking about how I would explain that I was canceling our call.
Truth or Consequences
Of course, my first thought was to use the Marsha Brady excuse and just say that "something suddenly came up". That of course would be the truth, but it sounds so phony.
Then I thought I would tell him that an important client called and wants to meet with me this afternoon so I must postpone because, well, you know, business comes first. As I played this scenario out in my mind I thought of two things. First, from his perspective, his call with me is business. Second, I wondered if this approach would communicate something that I really do not want to communicate, i.e. your time is important to me, but not as important as some of the other things I do.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that the ultimate sign of respect for my provider and his time would be for me to tell him the truth. So that is what I did. I sent an email explaining my involvement in the play and the Director’s last minute request for help. This of course, does not change the fact that I am canceling at the last minute, and he may not be at all interested in the details of why I am doing so, but I think that by telling him the truth, I am strengthening the trust that we will need to begin working together.
I don’t know if we will build a mutually successful business relationship, but I do know that I want whatever we do to be founded on trust. The only way I know how to do that is to be truthful about it. Sometimes I think we are afraid to tell the truth, but I think people really do understand and value it.
To Tell The Truth
I got a note back from my provider expressing surprise and excitement to learn that I am doing this production. He was more than willing to reschedule and we now have a new time slotted. I am grateful for his willingness to do this and I began to wonder if the truth works in all cases.
For example, have you ever been late to an appointment because you either got up late or left late, but instead of just saying, I am running late, you told the client that there was heavy traffic? I think I have used that excuse once or twice myself. What do you think would happen if you just called ahead and said, "I got a late start and that means I am going to be late. Do you want to reschedule or will you still have time"? Do you think you would lose or gain more clients that way? Do you think you would leave more often on time or less often on time if you told the truth about this each time?
How about this one. Have you ever been late to turn in a report to the board, your boss or a work team and instead of telling them you need more time to get everything figured out you blame a provider or a co-worker for not getting the information you needed to you on time? What if you just admitted that it was more complex than you had originally planned or that you were busy with some other things and you got a late start and now you need more time? Do you think they would really object if you proposed a new date and stuck to the new timeline? Either way they are going to get it late, so they might as well know what the real circumstances. I think this would help them believe that they can trust the new timeline. Do you think they would see your honesty as just another excuse? Do you think your resolve to finish it on time would be strengthened or weakened?
The Truth Matters
I think we live in a world that makes it seem like it is ok to misrepresent the truth. A common response when I speak about this issue, is that "everybody" does it. I usually follow-up that statement with a question; "Does that make it alright?" I don’t think it does and I think the only way we can change it is to look inward. This is not the kind of change you can demand, or even expect, other people to make. This is the kind of change that starts with me first. If I want others to grow in this area, then I must let them see me grow in this area first.
The consequence of acting this way is that people will begin to see you as authentic and honest. They will also see you as accountable because as you speak the truth, you become more committed to delivering at the next opportunity. That is how I want people to see me. What about you?
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