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Holding Up The Mirror

I presently find myself bothered by the actions of a couple of people in my life. Their behavior, does not really affect my existence, but for some reason, I feel very disappointed by it. I expected more from these individuals and so I feel like they deserve the circumstances they currently face, which are indeed unfortunate.

I See Me

This morning, during a meditative moment, I pondered some instructions on how to live a balanced and happy life. I saw a few gaps in my own personal behavior and began to contemplate how I might grow beyond these personal stoppers.

As I thought about each item, the faces of the people I described at the beginning of this post entered my mind. I saw that the things that are bothering me about them are actually things that are bothering me about me. My behavior, in many ways parallels their behavior. The circumstances are different, but the actions are very similar.

As I allowed myself to dig deeper, I began to see an even bigger sin. The image of the "judgmental" me stood before my eyes and I witnessed the pain that I am causing others. Instead of comforting them while they were in need of comfort, I judged them. My words did not condemn them, but my silent actions added to their sorrow.

Convicted, I sat marveling at how easy it is to project my own sins upon others. The rancor I feel at their behavior is actually a release from my own disappointment. Judging and condemning someone else for some reason, makes me feel free from my own fault. They become the worst side of me, and I somehow eliminate my own guilt.

Moving Forward

The purpose of my life is to help others become their best. There is work for me to do so that I may fulfill that vision. The growth opportunity now standing before me is one of letting go. I constantly say that life is not about what we do, it is about what we do about what we do. My behavior has been inconsistent with that belief. I have held on to the past, instead of allowing the people in my life the freedom and opportunity to move forward. This grip on what happened, will continually prevent me from moving forward. These questions helped me refocus my efforts.

What do I really want for my friends?

Am I comforting them in the moments when they need comfort?

In what way can I support them now?

Am I willing to forgive myself and move forward?

I finished my morning meditation knowing that some of the judgement remained with me. I know that awareness is only the beginning and that I have work to do now to let go. As I let go of some these feelings, my own imperfections stare me in the face. It is easy to feel angry with myself, and guilty for behaving in such a way. These feelings don't last long because I willingly forgive myself and consciously decide to be better. As I look at the previous me, I feel grateful for the lessons learned. The sun is shining and I can see a glimpse of the future me. This gives me the hope and the faith I need to move my feet. See you on path.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

Tags: Authenticity, Dr. Andrew Thorn, Heart Might Mind & Strength, Leader Behaviors, Powerful Questions, Self-Deception, Spiritual Intelligence, The Authentic Me

This entry was posted on Friday, July 9th, 2010 at 4:34 pm and is filed under Accountability, Authentic Behavior, Personal Best Leadership, Relationships, Stepping Up. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.