What Happened?

One of the great things about a New Year resolutions is that we rarely feel guilty about it when we fail to keep them. I am all for not feeling guilt, but I think we owe ourselves the gift of continually resolving to do better. 

The problem with most resolutions is that they are poorly considered. Most of us spend very little time figuring out what we want to do. Like me, you may have even seen some made in a drunken stupor on New Year's Eve. Heck, you may have even made some that way. Is it any wonder they a broken in short order. 

Making Them Count

Despite their reputation for being quickly dismissed, I believe it is very important to regularly make and keep "new you" resolutions. Did you catch that? I said regularly, not just annually; and I also said "new you" and not New Year.

So how do we make them count? First, we must take the time to clearly define our purpose in life. This is a difficult task, and one that most healthy people avoid. For some strange reason, we leave that work unfinished until we face a crisis. Then our purpose becomes very important. I don't want to wait for a crisis to define my purpose in life, do you?

Until our purpose is clearly stated, our resolutions will be difficult to keep. This is because we won't really know what we want and so we will allow ourselves to set resolutions that really don't matter to us. If it doesn't matter to us, we won't do if for very long. Each resolution we set must be clearly aligned with our purpose. When we do that, we find it very easy to engage in, and even fulfill our "New You" resolutions.

Another tool that will help us to stay resolved is the development of key indicators. Many of us understand this, and do it very effectively in our businesses, but for some reason, only a few of us do it effectively in our personal lives.

How can we expect to succeed if we don't know what success looks like? Key indicators help us to insure we are on the right track. They also help us measure our progress. When the right indicators are developed, we become free to make adjustments and to evaluate our progress.

Happy New You!

It's not too late. Some of my resolutions for 2011 are still being formed. I am not the least bit worried about that. I know that when I take the time to get them right, I am much more likely to see them to completion. I also understand that my resolutions live with me. That means that they are refined and redefined at various times throughout the year. 

What do I want?'

How will I get it?

What will it cost me?

When will I start?

These are some of the questions I ask myself when I am serious about setting new resolutions. Before you start, you may want to consider a check-up on your purpose. It is easier than you think. Just start by asking yourself who you want to become. Then let your self dream. Just find the space and time to capture the thoughts in your head. Empty them without fear of judgment. Get them all out. I find it most useful to hand write it. I like the feel of the flow of my hand when it synchronizes with my brain. Typing it out works well too. The important thing is just to move, for every movement you make, as long as it is aligned with your purpose, brings you closer to realizing your goals.

Live Today! Love Today!

Dr. Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548 

Back In The Saddle Again 

Today, I feel rested and ready to jump back in to the game of life. As I sat down to plan my week, I realized that I am in the midst of some very significant commitments. Several of these projects are set to kick-off over the course of the next two weeks and I am not ready. 

A part of me feels very worried. The weight of these responsibilities is heavy and there is a lot riding on their successful completion. My immediate desire is to ride off in multiple directions with the hope of getting as much as I possibly can get done on each project. I know this strategy will not work so I am tempering this desire with focused planning.

The Busy Life

Sometimes when we are busy, we feel the urge to move quickly. Because there are only so many hours in the day, we believe that moving fast will help us accomplish more. Unfortunately, many of us have come to know for our selves, that speed is usually not the best solution. The truth is, it often leads to more pressure and stress and a lot of mistakes. 

The key is to align our actions with our purpose. This ensures that we are always moving in the right direction. Movement in the right direction, even in the most stressful of times, is always more valuable that moving quickly. We have all experienced the thrill of going no where fast. It is in those moments when we long to be on the right path.

Busy work is often necessary, but we must make sure that our busy efforts will actually lead us to the results we want. If it won't, then we need to find out what will, or we will begin to feel overwhelmed and out of balance. 

Moving Forward

Forward progress, gives us a sense of satisfaction. It helps us feel good about the work we are doing and renews our energy. 

Are you making progress on your meaningful goals?

Do you appreciate the progress you are making?

When was the last time you slowed down so that you could make sure that you were moving in the right direction?

We are in charge of creating our own legacy. We will leave one, whether we focus on it or not. Planning, helps me understand the ramifications of each and every move i make. When I plan, I move with purpose, when I fail to plan, I become subject to the random pulls of the universe. Whenever I feel busy, I remind myself that there will always be enough time to accomplish the things that matter most. Then I spend a few minutes reconnecting with what really matters. It may seem like a delay in the heat of things, but it always saves me time. 

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

This Day Belongs To Me

I know it is because I make each day my own. My secret is to prepare as if everything that I am, depends upon me being ready to make the most of each day. I approach life with wonder – the type of wonder that awakens me to the possibility that I will be asked to step into the shoes of greatness. 

Even when the odds are against me, I step into my vision with a certainty that all will be well. I am not afraid of what might present itself, instead I remind myself that I am ready at a moment's notice to share my story and the moments that define who I am.

Do you make the day, or does the day make you?

Do you know who you are, and are you ready to be that person?

Are you willing to share the very best of you are with those you meet?

It is often a very scary proposition to stand in the vision. It requires faith and hope and an abundant nature. Too often we embrace our poverty as if letting go will deprive us of something worth holding. Today, I dare you to stand in your vision – it is where you will feel most alive.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

For some members in our little group, this will be the most difficult experience they have ever faced. For others, it will be a welcome relief from the pressure they face on a daily basis. For me, it will be my first experience as the oldest person in the group. I don't feel it, but I know my time to stand on the top is ebbing, so I will enjoy every moment as we ascend to wonderful heights. 

We will all see something different when we stand on this high point. That is one of the greatest things about life – despite the face that we share each day with each other, our experience is always individual. 

I am thankful for the high points in my life. There have been many, and each one brought different meaning and purpose to my tiny / grand existence. That is why I am constantly reaching for new heights. I need to stretch and be stretched so that I can become my best.

What are the high points of your life?

What lessons did you learn from standing on the top?

When was the last time you reached for a new peak experience?

I will think of you when I am on the top of Southern California. I will express my thanks for your support and my desire for you to become your best. Please do the same for me!

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

LOST

We hiked up the south face of the mountain. This is the side that gets the most afternoon sun. We were warm and the trail avoided most of the remaining patches of snow.

The trip down was a different story. We descended the north face and discovered some extremely different circumstances. It was a challenge. In many places, the snow was up to our waist lines and the trail was difficult to discern.

At one point, we completely lost the trail. Our natural feeling was to head down, but something inside of me kept telling me to stay high on the mountain, even though heading down, looked like the right idea. As I traversed the mountain pondering our next step, I kept thinking how easy it would be to just head down, but the feeling of finding higher ground kept gnawing on me.

I decided to pull out my map and study the trail and topographic lines. My hope was to orient myself on the mountain so I could begin to see where the trail should be. As I studied the map, I could see that if we headed down in the direction that looked like the path of least resistance, we would walk our way right into some significant cliffs which would force us to return up a steep and dangerous snow covered trail. 

Getting Back On Course

I oriented myself on the mountain and it immediately became clear that the trail was definitely above us. I had no way of knowing for sure, but I thought it was as few as 50 yards and as much as 500 yards above our current position.

We started walking up the slope. It was very difficult. Within a few moments, I thought I heard a marching band, and then realized it was the beating of my heart. We had only gone about 20 feet and I was exhausted. I really considered the thought of giving up and dying on the trail. I didn't think I could make it 50 yards and 500 yards would have been impossible. Pure will to survive kept me moving.

Fortunately, we found the trail, and it was only about 40 feet up from our original position. The sight of the trail enlivened our spirits, and we became focused on making sure that we did not lose it again. The remainder or our hike through the snow pack, challenged us as much mentally as it did physically, and it was quite a relief to finally make it below the snow line.

Gaining Perspective

The last couple of days have given me the opportunity to put this experience into perspective. Life is full of moments when we are unable to discern the trail. We sometimes think that if we just keep moving forward we will find the trail again. We are often in such a hurry to get there, that we just launch into whatever lies ahead with a belief that speed is our friend. Direction is more important than speed and we need to be certain that we are heading in the right direction.

The smallest movements in the wrong direction can create the harmful circumstances. Correcting the course is a very difficult proposition and can prove to be more than we are able to bear. This is why we need to be conscious about our movements and regularly check them against our general plan.

Can you see the trail to your success?

Our your actions taking you toward or away from the safest and most reliable path?

Do you have a map that you can use to orient yourself when you find yourself off track?

Over the course of the many years of my work, I have discovered that even the most successful people at times find themselves off track and unaligned with their goals. They realize the need to stop and look around and gain perspective. I enjoy helping them do that. Today, I challenge you to notice where you are and see what steps you need to take to sharpen your focus. Don't be afraid to recalibrate, it may seem like more work at the time, but your actions to stay on course will save you from arriving at the cliffs of insanity.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

I have passed through the area several times during the past six years and the work being done is breath taking. Some people have actually worked on that job since its inception. To them, it is probably hard to see the progress, but to the infrequent passerby it is extremely evident. I am exited to drive across its span and benefit from the incredible work of the bridge builders.

Insoluable Problems

Today, I am standing on the opposite side of  where I want to be. This confession does not mean anything more than to say that I have goals that need to be reached, and that I can see the gap in between where I am at right now, and who I must become in order to reach those goals. 

When I see this gap, I feel overwhelmed. It is huge, so It is easy to become discouraged. I often have thoughts of turning back. Fortunately, the vision of what is on the other side is enticing. I can see it very clearly, so I keep my focus on building the bridge that will get me to the other side. Simply put, the gap is part of the journey. It does not define me, and it never will. It must be crossed but I understand that it will never be solved. 

Like the deep canyon below the Hoover Dam Bypass Bridge, this gap will always be there. The bridge I build will merely carry me safely across to the other side. Once built, the bridge does not guarantee safety, it only provides safe passage. If I become careless, I can still fall into the chasm below. If I refuse to move on to new goals, its danger will continue to plague me.

Building Bridges

Therefore, once the bridge is finished I am moving on. It may take me a while to build it, but I am not going to worry about sticking around to live on it. It is a bridge, not a house. My goal is to become the person I can see on the other side. 

The joy is in the journey. The crossing happens a little bit each day, sometimes imperceptibly, until I finally stand on the other side. The experiences I gain from building this bridge will help me carry on when I reach the other side. Once there, I am sure I will discover new goals and gaps. Each new crossing will be equally exciting. 

What do you see – the overwhelming gap or the future on the other side?

Are you pressing forward or turning back?

What thoughts keep you going?

I am amazed when I look back at how many bridges I have built. Most of them are of no use to me now, they were merely private victories of a previous me. This admission does not prevent me from continuing the work of today. Instead, it inspires me. My goal is to make sure that the work I do today, will somehow add to the structure that will eventually be a bridge to who I want to become. Any thing less than that would result in the waste of the most precious resource I possess. TIME!

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

Inventing Reality

This caused me to have a deep conversation with myself about reality. An influential person in my life taught me nearly 20 years ago that I can invent whatever reality I want to invent. He told me that when I argue my limitations they become mine and I am stuck with them.

This is quite an amazing thought. Can it really be true? Is the only thing that limits our opportunities our own fears, doubts and/or willingness to accept the status quo? Do we really have the power to accomplish anything we want? What do you believe?

Almost a month ago I started on several very powerful and difficult challenges. I dreamed that I could accomplish these goals within a 90 day period. Many around me think I am crazy. This does not change the fact that I am doing things that they thought would be impossible. I am tired, and challenged but I am building the physical and mental muscles I need to make it happen. I look forward to the time when the rest of me becomes accustomed to the physical and mental exertion that my mind so easily embraces. I am getting tired of waiting for the rest of me to catch up with who I am becoming.

Making It Happen

Since I began this process I have not used an alarm clock. I wake up every day at exactly 4:30 AM. I have not felt tired when I get up. I have not felt like I want to stay in bed, even when my body is still sore, but I have yet to finish a day when I felt like I could keep going. In fact, when I finish, I can barely crawl into bed.

Despite what I am accomplishing, doubt sometimes creeps into my mind. Today I saw the immensity of the task at hand. I thought to myself, "How can I possibly believe that I can stretch myself in these ways?" I was consumed for a moment with the response, "I can't." But for some reason I just keep going, even when I didn't feel like I could keep going. I found my self screaming, "THIS IS NOT MY LIMIT." "I AM DESTINED TO BECOME A BETTER ME."

A Powerful Purpose Statement

I often reflect on a song titled "Corner of the Sky" from the Broadway Musical Pippin. The version I have, is sung by the great Diana Ross. The chorus of that song says – "Rivers belong where they can ramble, Eagles belong where they can fly. I've got to be, where my spirit can run free. Gotta find my corner of the sky."

What a great purpose statement. I don't want to be mediocre or normal. I want to continually push my limits and discover just who I am really capable of becoming. It is not easy being a "Master of Make It Happen." Each experience raises the bar, which means that I must continually be something better each time out. That is a lot of pressure to operate under, but it is the only way that I believe that we can truly satisfy the demands of continuous improvement.

What limits are you running up against?

How will you break through them?

As I tear down the walls of previous realities, I discover that I built those walls. I truly am the one who decides my own limits. My reality begins and ends by my own definition. I haven't figured out how to levitate or walk through walls but I no longer believe that it is impossible. I know it sounds crazy, but today the asphalt felt like foam padding. Go figure! 

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

The Rear View Mirror

We often look back on the mistakes we made in search of insights on how we can become better. I agree that this is a valuable exercise, but I think it can also hinder our progress when we do it too much.This is because we cannot change the past. We can learn from it, but in order to do that, we must be willing to let it go. That is very hard to do when we are constantly focusing on it. 

To illustrate this point, I invite you to think for a moment about the last time you drove your car. I am sure that you regularly checked your rear view mirror. The information from that tool is critical, but imagine what would happen if you attempted to drive your car with only the information you gain by looking into the backward facing mirrors. The results would be disastrous.

The Front Windshield

The view ahead is wide and expansive. It allows us to identify opportunities and threats. We choose our focal point. We go where we look, and we can course correct at any given moment. Periodic "look backs" are necessary, but the majority of our attention must be forward facing.

Success is accelerated when our forward focus is dominated by the positive things we can do to stay on course. There are many ways to get this information. I am particularly fond of asking powerful questions that help me discover the positive steps I can take to ensure forward progress. 

I ask these questions of myself and of others. When I ask them of myself, I am allowing myself to be in a reflective state. When I ask them of others, I am allowing myself to be in a receptive state. I ask them so that I may discover positive suggestions that will help me reach my developmental targets. I want to see and hear the things I can do to become the best "me". I want to receive that information in the most positive light possible.

These moments are much different than feedback sessions. Instead of examining the past and what I did wrong, these are opportunities to ponder the road ahead and what I may become.

Now Is The Time

The hope of spring provides an excellent opportunity to look forward. Now is the time to identify the steps that will take you to your next level. The days are longer and the spirit of renewal is in the air. Take some time to ask yourself the following questions.

Am I checking the rearview mirror too often? 

Am I focusing enough on the opportunities of the future?

Am I allowing others to speak positive suggestions in my life about the goals I wish to accomplish?

The front windshield provides much better information than the rearview mirror. Your opportunities are straight ahead. You are going to go where you steer, so steer toward the positive.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

Measuring Your Growth

Every April and October, we take time in our home to measure the physical growth our children have experienced. Each child lines up against our pantry door and we place a mark that captures their current height. It is fun to see how much taller each one has become over the course of only six months. So far, no one has reached their peak and we are able to measure growth over each period, but we understand that eventually their physical growth will stop.

Fortunately, our personal growth and development never have to reach a peak. We can continue to grow throughout our lives. If we stay focused on becoming our best, we can consistently reach for, and arrive at, new heights.

Measuring this type of growth requires a different tool. We cannot use a tape measure or a scale. It also requires a different method for setting goals.  

BECOME Goals

Many of us have learned how to set SMART goals. This formula is an excellent tool for project management, but I don't think they work as well for personal growth initiatives. 

Growth and development are always focused on becoming. They are a process that is constantly in motion. I have been experimenting with a new model and came up with what I call The BECOME Formula™. This formula is more conducive to setting behavioral based goals, and staying engaged in the process. I find it to be fully capable of influencing our personal development. Here it is:

B – Believe that you can become better. 

E – Envision your success. Clearly define the development you want. Dream big.

C – Collect feedback from others. Make sure your efforts are delivering the results you want. 

O – Overcome the fear of being great. Believe in you and let go of any negative feelings.

M – Measure the cost of success. Know what commitments it will take and be willing to do them.

E – Everyday, be willing to do something that will move you closer to your goals. 

I have used this formula now for over two years and it works. It helps me to stay focused on becoming instead of achieving. That is the biggest difference between the SMART Goal formula and The BECOME Formula™ - It helps me stay engaged in the development that I really want in my life.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

Renewal

This is the perfect time to renew individual commitments. I am not surprised that we make New Year's resolutions, but I am surprised that we don't also make Spring Resolutions. Everything around us right now is regenerating and growing. The blossoms seen everywhere indicate that our barren trees will soon have leaves and fruit on them again. The seasonal signs are all pointing to growth.

New Year's resolutions are usually made in the midst of hibernating moments. The desire is there to improve and be better, but the circumstances of the season make it nearly impossible to really get at it. The sun rarely shines when we are not working, and that adds to the fatigue we feel.

Spring changes all that. The sun rises earlier and sets later. We have more time to enjoy life after work. Everything around us points to energy and renewal.

Don't Be An April Fool

Now is the time to spring forward. Don't let this energy pass you by. Take a look at your resolutions and resolve to make them realities. There is something inside of you that planted those seeds. The conditions are now optimal. It is time to cultivate your garden of dreams and aspirations. 

Do you remember your New Year's Resolutions?

Are you willing to let spring breathe life into them?

What would life be like if you did?

The darkness of winter will soon return. You will reap what you sew, so get busy. Let spring be the propelling force to move your feet. 

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

Because she is so good at what she does, she feels like she does not need to work very hard. Sometimes that is true, at least she gets by, but usually it prevents her from reaching her true potential. We don't know how good she really can be, because she never really tries.

When Good Enough Isn't

This problem is effecting her performance. I am sure she would be surprised to discover how many errors she actually makes. Her personal confidence, and her advanced skill set temporarily masks a lot of her problems. At first glance, everything looks really good, but after a while the fact that she is winging it becomes very noticeable. 

All she really needs to do to fix this problem is to polish her skills. It wouldn't take much effort. She just needs to prepare a little bit more and she would be amazing. 

Her behavior models the old saying, "the enemy of the great is the very good." Her goodness is getting in the way of her greatness. Fortunately, she is beginning to see this problem and we are making progress.

Attributes of Success

My client is experiencing a really common road block for successful people. Many think that because they are better than their closest peer, they don't have to worry, or even they don't have to grow. They think they can relax. This behavior of course is counter-productive and actually leads to a gradual decay in their natural set of skills. 

If you want to be the best at what you do, you must be willing to constantly raise the bar. This means that you must never stop learning and growing. 

Successful people practice more than others. What they do looks easy, and that is because they practice when we aren't looking. They know how to polish their natural talents and use them effectively. They know their limits and their shortcomings, because they have taken the time to understand them. It is not that they are better than unsuccessful people, it is just that they are more willing to do what unsuccessful people are not willing to do. They know they must get better every day, so they do not rely on the skills that saved them yesterday. They spend the time developing the ones they will need tomorrow.

Raising Your Bar

I imagine that you feel pretty good about your successes. You should, but I wonder, if you have ever found yourself in the same situation as my client? I know that there has been a time or two when I have. 

Is your good preventing you from becoming great?

How much effort are you investing in becoming your best?

Are you willing to raise the bar?

Don't let your good get in the way of your best. Dare to reach for a new level, no matter what level you are at. It is not about the result, it is about the energy that comes from setting a new standard. Go for it!

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

We always begin with confidence. When we leave the car, we know we are going to make it to the top. The first few miles fly by and the excitement of being on the trail keeps us going. Progress always means that the trail becomes more difficult. Soon we are either lost in endless switchbacks or steep ascents. Either way, our bodies and minds begin to feel the significance of the challenge ahead.

Reaching For The Top

No matter how prepared we are, the final trail to the peak is always a shock to our system. It is usually less traveled and more difficult to discern than the lower level trails. Its steepness reeks of danger and we always move a little more cautiously. The visual stimulus conjures uncertain thoughts, and there is always a point where the trail ahead looks too difficult and we wonder if we can make it, or if it is worth the risk to continue.

It is interesting to note that this point of uncertainty is usually just a few hundred yards from the top. The goal is in site, yet we still feel like turning back. 

The Summits of Life

I find myself in similar place on several projects right now. The finish lines are in sight, but I am tired. There are even moments when I find myself wondering if I have what it takes to go the distance. I am thankful for my experiences of climbing mountain peaks because I am using them to help me stay on target.

My successes on the mountain trails help me to believe that I will be equally successful on the trails of life. I have a plan and I can see where I am going. This keeps fear and doubt from discouraging me. I have been to the top of other summits and I will make it to the top of these ones.  

Only The Beginning

Rarely do we ever summit the highest peak. From the top we can always see another distant mountain worth climbing. Our summits become the base camps of our future climbs. It is there that we can see our next pursuit. It is there that a new vision is born.

The moments at the top are generally very brief. We capture it with a picture, enjoy the view, and then head out in search of the next adventure. We know that our time on the trail, and the lessons we learn are much more valuable than the moments we spend at the top, but standing on the top helps us to appreciate the trail and make meaning out of it.

What truths have you discovered at the top of the peaks you have climbed?

Where do you stand today? Can you see your peak of choice?

Are you reaching for the next level?

Reach for it. Don't stop until you get there. It is closer than you think and you can be whoever you want to be. The view at the top will help you see more clearly the successes of the previous and future you. My promise is always the same – "You ain't seen nothin yet!"

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

Most people I know are very good at keeping the promises they make to others. It would be an abnormal occurrence for them to fail on these promises, but for some reason, many struggle in keeping the promises they make to themselves. They either run out of time or out of energy and they compromise their own agenda.

Say What You Mean

I suppose I am especially thinking about this today, because it is now late in the afternoon and I am just getting ready to publish my thoughts for the day.

If you are a regular reader, then you know that I made a commitment to post a daily article to this space. If you have checked to see if the post of the day is up, then you received that commitment as a promise between you and me. I value that promise and I have thought about you many times during the day, but that is not what is motivating me to collect my thoughts.

My commitment is as much to myself as it is to you. I write, so that I will develop my skills as an author. I write, so that I will stay focused on creating new content. I write, so that I will remain open enough to share with you what is going on inside of me.

I verbalized this promise to myself, so that I would have additional leverage, (you), to hold myself accountable. I want to be known as one who does what he says he is going to do, so I am willing to push aside the business of today and add to the record of the The Authentic Me.

Living Up To The Promise

Involving others in the promises we make to ourselves is one of the surest ways of keeping those promises. It helps us stay aware and on target.

What do you do to ensure that you keep the promises that you make to yourself?

Do you tell people that are willing to follow up with you?

What promises are you keeping?

Think about the people in your circle of influence who keep the promises they make to themselves. How do you view those individuals? Now think about the people who don't keep the promises they make to themselves. How do you view them? 

Now, consider your ability to keep the promises you make to yourself? Which side do you fall on? Are you willing grow?

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

I wanted to see the town, so I set my alarm and arose early to run into it. It was only a mile and half away, so I figured it would be a nice short run to get me going for the day.

It's All Downhill

Dawn had not yet arrived when I left the home, and the air was crisp. The stars were still lighting the clear, dark sky. It felt incredible to be outdoors and for some reason my body settled into the rigors of the run much quicker than normal. I ran at a pace that was faster than my usual gait. I literally felt stronger than my normal self, and that invigorated me.

I lost myself in thought and arrived at the center of the town, sooner than I expected. Because I felt so good, I decided to run a little further. I ran another mile and half and then decided to head back to my friends home.

Uh-Oh

Immediately, I discovered the source of my energy. There was something that I hadn't realized when I left the house. Because I was feeling so good, and since it was dark, I failed to understand the steepness of the road into town. I felt so good as I descended, that the hill really didn't seem as steep as it actually was. I labored as I ran to get back to the top of it. I was surprised at how difficult it was to be on the very same road that only moments before seemed like the perfect run. I was on the same road, but the direction I was heading made the degree of difficulty much more challenging.

As I reflected on my situation I thought about how similar this is to life. Have you ever met someone on a road that to you did not seem particularly difficult, but for some reason the person you met was struggling?

I have, and I hate to say it, but I have some times judged these people as either unfocused or unable to function. I never considered the direction they were heading on the road. They looked like they were in motion and moving fairly quickly, but they may have been running up hill. 

When I found myself that day on the same road huffing and puffing, I became aware of how ironic my situation really was. I was running on the same dirt. Nothing had changed except my direction. This change in direction caused me to have a change in perception as to the difficulty of the road. It even caused me to have to work much harder. I was unable to coast and catch my breath. It was a new challenge.

Check Your Direction

Some times, we are in too big of a hurry to get to where we are going, that we fail to figure the direction we are heading. We think if we move quickly, we will get there faster. The direction is much more important than our speed. It has the ability to influence the ease of the journey.

What direction are you heading?

Are you hurrying quickly on a difficult path?

What adjustments can you make to move in a better way?

When we move in the right direction, we are in a better position to help others. Because we feel strong, we have enough to inspire others to seek the next level. Chart your course wisely – it will make all the difference in where and how you arrive.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

A few of you followed-up with me to see how I was doing. I appreciated that and it kept me focused on this big project. 

U-wun-ge-lay-ma

That funky phase you just read is the title of my book. I missed my deadline by one month, but it is now finished and getting ready to go to the editor. The phrase comes from an African fable called the The Tale of The Name of The Tree. U-wun-ge-lay-ma is the name of the tree and when it is spoken the tree releases its life giving fruit.

The fable takes place during the time of famine. The name of the tree is difficult to pronounce and even harder to remember. No one is able to say it, so the characters, one by one, set off to visit it with a wise chief to learn the name of the tree. Each one faces a unique set of circumstances on their way back to the tree which causes them to forget the name. Finally, the tortoise is able to return and pronounce the name to release the fruit.

A Guide To Next Level Living

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times; it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness; it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity; it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness; it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair; we had everything before us, we had nothing before us; we were all going directly to Heaven, we were all going the other way- in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only."

So begins Charles Dickens' book the Tale of Two Cities. It literally describes our day. Some right now are finding new feasts and others are suffering in old famines. Where do you find yourself?

Opportunity Of A Lifetime

I find myself seeing opportunity. I see that there are risks, but I am willing to take them. Playing safe, never inspires me. I know that living a full life requires the stomach to take risks. I cannot, no, I will not live in fear. I will not believe that it is a time to search for security or to hunker down. That is what is causing our economy to remain stagnant.

There is too much fear going around right now and prosperity is not a game for the faint of heart. Abundance only comes to those who spend their days passionately creating success. Stepping into uncertainty is the leading requirement. The openings that lead to greatness are created by taking that step. No one ever did it without taking a risk.

Of course this means that we will live through some very uncomfortable experiences, but only those who learn how to lean into the discomfort finally discover the secrets of abundance. Does anybody ever look back on life and say, "I wish I played it safe"? I don't think so. In fact, I think the risks we take, whether successful or unsuccessful, create our most memorable experiences. They are the moments that define and enlighten us. 

Safe Risk

Before taking that step, we must learn to count the cost. It is true, that no matter how prepared we are, some risks will just not pay off, and that is why we must consider the options before us. Risk is only made safe when we make wise choices. We must know what is at stake, and if we are able to stand losing it. If we cannot afford to lose the required investment, then we must never make it.

Some people decide that they can't lose anything, so they never take a risk. The never seek to push their own boundaries. I may not be able to make a million dollar investment right now, but perhaps I can make a $5,000.00 one. Risk means that we are stretching ourselves beyond our current limits. That means that we must be willing to take chances. 

Now Is The Time

Right now, I am in the middle of taking some major risks. I see the opportunities before me that will lead me to the next level. I am afraid. Simply put, thinking about what it will take for me to do what I must do, frightens me. I feel nervous and worried, but those feelings are calling me to greatness. They are the feelings that inspire me to move forward.

For the first time in a few years, I am asking myself one of my favorite questions; "what is the worst thing I could lose?" That is the question I ask before I move forward. I go over the worst case scenario and once I have a chance to stare it in the face, I am no longer afraid of it. Seeing the worst, makes me realize that it wouldn't be that bad, so I take the leap of faith required to create the opening I need.

What risks are before you?

What will happen if you take them? What will happen if you choose not to take them?

What is the worst thing you would lose if you took the chance before you? Would that really be that bad?

There is an opening. You may not be able to see it right now, but it is there. Trust yourself, and let your mind ponder your next move. The older I become, the more I believe that life is an illusion that we create. Our willingness to step forward, creates freedom, greatness and success. Our fear suppresses our very best. Don't just sit there saying it can't be done, create your opening.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548 

I am fascinated by a phenomena that I call “the last five pounds”. Anybody who has ever been on a weight loss campaign understands this without much explanation. In the beginning our efforts yield what look like immense progress, but there comes a point when we feel like we are at a complete standstill. The major gains we once enjoyed, are now, barely recognizable. Maintenance is a difficult proposition in and of itself, and when we get close to realizing a soul-stretching goal, the remaining distance can appear next to impossible. Many have come within five pounds of their ideal weight, only to discover that the “last five pounds” can seem like the impossible dream. It is here, that they pause to rest, some even turn back.

These are what I call success plateaus. From this vantage point, we can see our goal, but the path now looks much steeper and more difficult than ever. It takes a lot of effort to keep going, but that is exactly what we must do.  

As we look ahead, we realize that what use to be good enough, will not serve us now. After a while, we realize that the journey to the next level is really a journey to perfection. The fact that most of us are far from perfection does not mean that we cannot be perfect, but for some reason, many successful people are afraid to state the goal. They think that others will see them as cocky or arrogant if they say, “I am reaching for perfection”.

Nobody Is Perfect

Some turn back at this point because they think it can’t be done. “Nobody is perfect”, that’s what they have learned, and they believe it. The reach for the next level ultimately becomes a reach for perfection.

What does perfection mean to you?

Do you think it is possible?

What motivates you to reach for it?

Wrapping our head around the idea of becoming perfect is not as difficult as it sounds. Consider again the "last five pounds". They are extremely difficult to shed, but many have done it. When they did, they became their perfect weight. That does not mean that they were without flaw or blemish, it just means that they, by their efforts, completed their journey to their goal weight. That sounds like perfection to me. What does it sound like to you?

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548 

Sometimes, I ask questions to which I already know the answer. I do this, because I want to see what other people know without influencing them. I don't want my thoughts to limit their thinking. I just want to know what they think. It helps me understand them better. It helps them become accountable for the work we are doing together.

I Am Not Looking For Theories

When I ask questions of you, I am not looking for theories. I have studied the theories, now I am learning how to apply them to my life. My questions an invitation for you to think with me. I want to know what you are thinking. I want to know how your thoughts might differ from mine. Your thoughts help me to grow. I find it very valuable when you tell me what you are seeing, and how you are applying your learnings to your life. 

The Most Powerful Question

I consider the single most important question I have discovered in all of my academic and applied learning opportunities to be: "What is my contribution to the problem? I deem it especially empowering because its answer, is the only thing I can change. I cannot change the contributions others are making. I can only change what I am doing. 

The answer to this question helps me clarify what I need to do to grow, and it helps me create an agenda for my own success. Because I am examining myself, I can make things happen. In other words, I am empowered to do what must be done, and to be who I must become. 

That question is much more powerful than asking, "why is this happening to me?" I call this question the "victim question", because it does not require me to take responsibility for my own actions or feelings. It really prevents me from acting, and renders me to a state, where I am constantly being acted upon. As a result, I feel helpless and unable to grow.

What Are Your Questions?

I really enjoy the reflective opportunities I create by posting to blog every day. The daily questions that I ask, remind me that this is not my opportunity to preach to you, or to tell you what to do. I simply seek to share my questions with you, believing that because I am asking them, I will discover my own answers. I realize that my answers will not always be meaningful to you, but that doesn't stop me from thinking that the questions will be. I like the thought of that.

How do questions help you when you find yourself up against a road block?

What questions do you use to inspire your individual growth?

The conundrums that puzzle my puzzler continue to offer me the greatest potential for individual growth. I cannot imagine going through life with asking these amazing questions of self-discovery. They continue to focus me on the discovery of meaning and purpose in my life. That is why I ask so many of them. They have a way of making life better. What do you think about questions?

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548

The Power of Choice

I am not sure I have it all figured out yet, but I am certain that a part of what we are watching on Lost is the power of choice, and the impact those choices have on the lives of the characters. Each episode features a decision point in the life of one of the players, and we see through their eyes the current decision and the history of their life and how it led them to make the decisions that they are making now.

I can't escape very far in the show without thinking about the impact of choices in my own life. I value the ability to choose more than any other freedom. To me it is the only real right we possess.

I find it interesting, that given the freedom to choose, I sometimes, make bad choices, wrong choices and even hurtful choices. I guess this surprises me, because, in the moment of making those choices, I do not feel like I am betraying myself or others. It just seems like I am making an appropriate choice. It is only later, when I experience the actual consequences of the choices, that I can judge their value and impact.

Proving Points

I read somewhere that good decisions come from experience, and experience comes from bad decisions. I have come to accept this as a half truth. I am aware that these moments of trial and error serve as a great wealth of wisdom, but I don't think that we must make bad decisions in order to learn how to make good ones. I think we are capable of escaping many of the blunders we voluntarily commit.

Sometimes I think we fail to recognize the impact of the good decisions we make. I believe that we learn more from the good decisions we make than we do from our poor choices. The negative ones hurt, so they stand out, but the more we strive to do right, the more capable we are of doing it. 

It is easier to make bad choices, because they don't take as much courage or integrity. Simply stated, I don't believe that poor decisions ever produced greatness. It is true that integrity, loyalty, and strength are virtues that are developed through the inner struggles each of us faces, but they are a result of the good decisions we make, and not the bad ones. They are bred by self-discipline.

Free To Choose

Our future is constantly being shaped by the choices we make. The trick is to decide how we will choose, before we are faced with the defining moment. It will not happen by chance. The power to make good choices is attained by deliberate effort.

What choices are you currently struggling with?

How can you develop greater self-discipline?

What are the choices that will lead you to greatness?

We are our greatest selves when we make our best choices. The consequences of our best choices result in an abundant, peaceful and satisfied life. I recognize that this is no easy matter, but nothing meaningful ever is.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548 

Though they both counted the cost, they now find themselves setting new standards for the speed of life. They are feeling the pain that comes from growing. Neither one is really worried, they just felt like they could share the load with me. They both believed that I might help them enjoy the moment and find peace.

Filling Ourselves Up

I first assured them that they are making good choices. Then I let them know that when we stretch to develop our talents, we find ourselves in a different kind of defining moments. These moments actually fill us up, unlike those that come from trials, which normally drain us of our energy, before they strengthen us. 

There is nothing better than pursuing our aspirations and dreams with purpose. When we do so, we raise the bar. It should not surprise us to discover that as we approach our goals, the path appears steeper than it did when we started out. No one reaches for greatness without feeling the weight of the trail. It is just part of the deal. If you want to go for it, there is a price to pay.

We Are Stretchable 

One conversation occurred over lunch. As I listened to my friend describe his sense of being overloaded, I grabbed my empty water glass and the pitcher of water on our table. I began pouring water into the glass and explained that I understood that in some ways he felt like the glass. I kept pouring the water and he became a bit anxious as it neared the top of the glass.

When I was just about to over fill, I said that sometimes we fill like life will overflow on us. We know water is getting to the top, but we do not really know how to stop it. I kept adding water to the glass until it overflowed. Then I made my point

The glass is fixed and can only hold its prescribed amount. You and I however are dynamic. Our capacity can be stretched. We are far more capable than we give ourselves credit, because we see ourselves as the glass. We wrongly believe that our limits can be reached. They cannot. Each time we stretch ourselves, our capacity stretches with it. 

Our Potential Is Limitless

We are made for continuous improvement. We define the limits by the choices we make. Some will say that a man 5 foot 3 inches tall cannot dunk a basketball. They probably never met Mugsy Bogues who did it regularly while enjoying 14 years in the NBA. I don't know how he did it, but he somehow found a way to become the shortest player to ever dunk in the NBA.

Of course, when I speak of our limitless potential, I am speaking of our ability to grow and develop our behaviors. Too often we are asked, "what do you do?" or "what do you want to do?" I think it is more important to focus on who we are, and who we want to become. That is the limit that I enjoy redefining. That is where the ultimate stretch occurs.

What are your current limits?

How will you expand them?

What strengths will make it possible for you to set a new standard?

Don't be afraid of becoming your best. Develop a talent, enhance your academic resume or just go out and serve others. Life is best, when we are full.

Live Today! Love Today!

Andrew Thorn

760-559-3548